sista sista.

img: papertissue.tumblr.com

i often gag at the word "sisterhood." this, most likely, can be attributed to countless new friends in cali who gawk at the revelation that i, in my college years, was in a sorority.

but lately i've found a new. deep. fresh. gratitude for sisterhood. one in particular has shown me such courage in her willingness to be intimate in friendship, rather than the standard operating girl procedures of : judge & be judged.

she doesn't even know it, but her words, her embrace, her presence, her stories....they've helped me to reclaim my heart. little. by. little.

what a dream you are, mare. what a radical, lovely, hopeful dream.

i work at big brothers big sisters.

and i'm so blessed by it. today, i interviewed a volunteer, who when asked what she would like her Little Sister to know about her, responded: "that i'm out-going...." then she paused....smiled...and said, "and that i like my life."

it was contagious....i smiled and thought about how even though i spent the past year in the longest, coldest winter season of my life...today, i like my life too. i remember long nights spent crying quietly and hours spent on our balcony, lips chapped from the cold wind. and i think how glorious it is that rescue can be so triumphant and sweeping sometimes, but in others...it's so quiet, gentle and sweet.

"Oh dear, oh dear," said Lucy. "And I was so pleased at finding you again. And I thought you'd let me stay. And I thought you'd come roaring in and frighten all the enemies away – like last time. And now everything is going to be horrid." "It is hard for you, little one," said Aslan. "But things never happen the same way twice." -prince caspian.

...so i've found.

for love's sake.

if thou must love me, let it be for nought

if thou must love me, let it be for nought
except for love's sake only. do not say-
"i love her for her smile-her look-her way
of speaking gently-for a trick of thought
that falls in well with mine, and certes brought
a sense of pleasant ease-on such a day."-
for these things in themselves, beloved, may
be changed, or change for thee-and love-so wrought,
may be unwrought so. neither love me for
thine own dear pity's wiping my tears dry-
a creature might forget to weep, who bore
thy comfort long, and lose their love thereby!
but love me for love's sake, that evermore
thou may'st love on, through Love's eternity

-elizabeth barrett browning

L o v e inspired b e a u t y.

"we turn not older with years but newer every day." -emily dickinson.

life is very good.

i feel very full and fed. not necessarily on food. just on life's beauty. thank You today.

lost.

today i got lost in the hills of hollywood and at first i really struggled. i panicked and got frustrated with the concept of not being able to get somewhere i was supposed to be. it made me feel like a little child. but then in a moment it shifted. i sat in my car, surrendered and asked for His presence. i opened my eyes and realized i was in one of the most beautiful and still places in the depths of the city. i sat atop the hollywood reservoir. and i happened to have my journal. i ended up journaling for two and a half hours. i may have missed out in some ways, but in other ways, i might have been just where i was supposed to be.

joined the mac revolution.

yeayuh.

king. of. spain.

swooning.

dear suzy,

photo found here.